The Great Boobie Dilemas

Today I'm gonna discuss Boobies that's right ladies and gentlemen (I mean boys) boobies. Here's my discussion about Boobies and how man must be designing bras for them. So there are numerous types of boobie holdsters let's discuss a few. First there is the V-front bra this bra for some reason when ever you are wearing it you might as well let one hang loose because it never fails a nip is always gonna fly freely when you are laying on the couch or trying to do housework. It never fails whenever you are bending over to pick up toys or mopping the floor one of your pointed suction cups will pop out and there's no use popping it back in til you're done with your chores since its inevitable that ones gonna jump right back out. Then there is the infamous sports bra which I don't know who thought of this one supposedly you are suppose to wear this while working out or running which neither of these do I commit myself to doing. So when this bra is worn on other occasions like hitting the bar or lounging around the house, or a quick sprint to the grocery store you might as well give up looking like you have a set of 20 year old funbags because if you are over thirty or a little on the "not-petite" size it will just look like you dropped a toddler in your shirt head first yes thats right I call it the "baby butt fashion" so instead of cleavage you if wearing your "juicy" jogging pants with this contraption you will have two cracks which then someone would be allowed to call you a butthead and get away with it. Then there is the "comfort fit" bra that has a "closed front suffocation device" supposedly to hold your knicky knack knockers in and make you walk with better posture that doesn't work either since if you are used to slouching you will find a way to have bad posture anyway. This device causes you to suffocate or have a handlebar on your back and of course it's not fashionable since you will have what I like to call the "Uni-boob" and hey if you only want to look like you have one by all means wear this just remember that looking like you have one boob will not lead people to believe you have lost weight. So that's my 15 minute gripe for today so ladies be smart and proud of what ya were blessed with let those ba-doob-a doobs roam free maybe it will rain while you are out on the town so people will give ya a prize for winning the on the spur of the moment wet t-shirt contest and don't worry about making a fashion statement just let em hang free and scare the children into wearing the appropriate ladies under apparel.