Quickie Blog about a Miraclous Quickie

So I get home from work this morning and I fall asleep on the couch didnt even change into my pajamas. I wake up roll off the couch deciding I need to go buy batteries for my camera. The man I live with whom I like to call my "insignificant other" picks a fight about the remote control (how petty). I shake my head to make my hair look like I hadnt been laying face down on the couch for about 2 hours drooling on my leopard print pillow. I grab my keys start to head out the door and "insignificant" says "go ahead go see your boyfriend!". As I stand there at the door getting ready to fling open the screen door I take a deep breath and think to myself as Im walking to my car....How the hell does a woman get from the front door of the house to the Rite Aid across the street and manage to accidentally find a penis oops I mean MAN to boink and get back home in 15 minutes with a receipt. OH! wait I forgot it must have been that God damn Monster energy drink I chugged while walking back out of the store to my car!